The Staring Culture

I’m not sure what it is about the midwest. Perhaps it’s a lack of entertainment value. Perhaps people just generally take a greater interest in each other’s lives. But people stare at you out here like you are the greatest new exhibit at the zoo.

No greater was this phenomenon manifest than in our recent trip through South Dakota. We were stared at in the parking lot. Stared at when backing out our car. Stared at in the grocery store. It’s not like there’s a shortage of white people out here. What’s so weird about us, people?!

Maybe I’m jaded by my Pacific Northwest upbringing. In the NW, we don’t stare at each other. In fact, we barely make eye contact when we pass each other on the street. I think this is due to the fact that we’re constantly slogging through the rain. If we lift our heads to greet one another, we’re bound to get drenched.

We also tend to keep to ourselves in the PNW. Our business is our business. This is also true of big cities like New York. There are stories of people being mugged or worse in big cities, and the people passing can’t be bothered to notice.

This is not the case in the midwest. Whatever is going on with you is everyone’s front page news. The situation was so intensely uncomfortable for me, someone who hates to be stared at, that I made John push through the whole state of South Dakota just to get us out of there!

Thankfully, we found refuge in the bigger cities of Omaha, Kansas City and Saint Louis.

Now, here in the south, people don’t really stare as much as they take a kindly interest in you. They greet you with friendly smiles. Instead of a curt wave or head-nod on the trail, I get “good morning!”-s and “how many miles did you do today, miss?”-es. I get “have a great day”-ed constantly. It’s really sweet.

It does bring me a bit of comfort to know that I ever were to run into trouble, all I need do is yell for help, and the twenty five people already staring at me will run to my aid. That’s the good thing about staring culture: everyone’s got your six…and your twelve…and your nine…and your three.

4 thoughts on “The Staring Culture”

  1. Welcome to the south! It is a cultural shock moving here, but in a really good way. Almost everyone is polite and friendly and call me sir here. All seem truly interested in helping one another. It is my very favorite attribute of the south…. caring, friendly people.

    Tip: When southerners stare (look you in the eye), it is a test to determine if you’re friendly or not. Look them in the eye, smile real big and say “hello”, “good morning” or “good afternoon”. Wonderful people here for the most part.

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